As you may have noticed, I have been a bit MIA for a while. I’m not really sure why to be exact, I have just been feeling quite down lately, and I thought writing it out would make me feel little better!
A lot of exciting things in my life are currently happening, and even though I should be happy about that, I am still feeling quite anxious and unhappy as if I didn’t care for these things. I haven’t been as excited about blogging lately, and I haven’t been as excited about my youtube. I usually love this creative stuff and I was started to get worried I was losing interest! Don’t be alarmed though, I thankfully haven’t! Today is the second day in a while that I have felt OK.
Yesterday was national RUOK? Day and it was so nice to have people that don’t generally check up on you, check up on you. I am lucky in the respect that I have an amazing family, boyfriend and close friends, but sometimes not being okay in yourself makes it feel like you have no one.
Recently, I have decided to quit my current job as a Concierge attendant after been given an opportunity to be a PA in an executive office. This is something that I have been wanting for a while now, as customer service was getting a bit boring for me, and I felt like I needed something more. I wasn’t getting the brain stimulation I wanted, so when I was given this opportunity, I would have been stupid to turn it down!
The direction in which I want my blog to go is unknown at this stage. I love my blogging, but after been so down, I haven’t had the chance, or desire to even open my admin site, and just write. However, I just always long to do it…hopefully now that I am in a better place, I can focus on the things I love whilst working at a great job. ( I start my new job on Monday, wish me luck!!!)
Anther thing that has been showing its face again much more lately, is my anxiety. Good ol’ anxiety…said no-one ever. I think it has been a combination of everything, but I have been a lot more irritable and anxious than i normally am and Im really not liking it. Mind you, I’m not sure theres anyone who actually likes this as it can take over your life. I once went through the stage where I didn’t want to talk to anyone just incase I would get anxious with them. I think maybe I was scared that that might had been happening again and I didn’t want to hang out with people as much as I usually do just incase that would happen again.
Yesterday (Friday) I finished my job. Honestly, I was miserable…the people were great….but the job…it just wasn’t me. And I feel like its important to change places if you’re feeling this way as it can get you down a lot more than you could ever expect. Today is Saturday and I start my new job on Monday (tomorrow as its now 12am) ooo thats scary!
I feel like life is starting to look up again, which means I’m starting to do all the things I love…write, sing, play guitar, blog, film & edit. Im sorry that I haven’t been as consistent as I would have liked.
Thank you for those who follow me and if you do, thank you for also reading my posts. It means so much more to me than you could ever have imagined!
If you’re also feeling like this, or a little down or confused in life, remember that you are not the only one and the person right next to you could also be feeling the same. Be careful about what you say to those your closest to, because even though they might not make it out that theres something wrong, there may be.
Its always best to be kind and caring!
If you ever want to talk, I am right here! You can comment down below and I will reply!
Remember, its okay to not be Okay. xx